Tag: life

Motherhood

“I Wonder What Version of Me My Kids Will Remember”

There are days I catch myself staring in the mirror a little longer than usual…
Not because I’m fixing my hair or makeup—
but because I’m trying to pull myself together before I walk back out that door.

Because motherhood doesn’t pause just because I’m overwhelmed.
It doesn’t wait until I feel okay again.

And sometimes I wonder…

What version of me will my kids remember?

Will they remember the mom who needed a few extra minutes in the bathroom just to breathe?
The one who felt stretched too thin, overstimulated, and unsure if she was getting any of it right?

Or will they remember something else?

Will they remember the mom who still showed up—
even on the days she felt like she had nothing left to give?

The one who got out of bed when she was exhausted.
The one who made the meals, even when she didn’t feel like eating herself.
The one who gave hugs, kisses, and “I love you’s” like they were second nature…
even when inside, she was quietly falling apart.

Because here’s the truth we don’t talk about enough:

Motherhood isn’t perfect.
It’s messy.
It’s emotional.
It’s overwhelming in ways no one can fully prepare you for.

And some days…
you’re not the mom you wanted to be.

But you’re still the mom they need.

I think about the moments I didn’t get it right.
The times I raised my voice.
The times I felt touched out, burned out, and just… done.

Those moments sit heavy.

But then there are the other moments too—

The bedtime snuggles.
The random “I love you, Mom.”
The way they still come to me when they’re hurt, scared, or need comfort.

And it makes me wonder if maybe… just maybe…

They don’t see me the way I see myself.

Maybe they don’t replay the hard moments the way I do.
Maybe they don’t keep score of the times I fell short.

Maybe they just remember that I was there.

That no matter what I was going through…
I stayed.

I showed up.
I kept going.
I loved them—through the chaos, through the exhaustion, through the healing.

And maybe that’s what matters most.

Not perfection.
Not having it all together.

But presence.

Because we’re all still learning.
We’re all still healing.
We’re all trying to figure this out as we go.

And doing that while raising little humans?

That’s not failure.

That’s strength.

So if you’re in a season where you feel like you’re barely holding it together…

I want you to hear this:

Your kids don’t need a perfect mom.
They need you.
Exactly as you are.

Showing up.
Trying again.
Loving them anyway.

And one day…

I truly believe they won’t remember the moments you struggled to hold it together.

They’ll remember the love.
The comfort.
The safety.

They’ll remember that you were there.

🧡 ⎯thee unfiltered mama

14 Days of Being a Mom-Day 3: Why I Love Being a Mom

Things I Wish I Knew Before Becoming a Mom

Before I became a mom, I thought I had a pretty good idea of what it would be like.

I thought I understood love.
I thought I understood exhaustion.
I thought I understood responsibility.

But the truth is… I didn’t know anything the way I thought I did.

No one really tells you how your whole world shifts overnight. Not just your schedule or your sleep—but you. Who you are, how you think, what you feel… it all changes in ways you can’t prepare for.

I wish I would have known that it’s okay to not have it all together.

There were days when the house was messy, I hadn’t brushed my hair, and I was running on nothing but coffee and survival mode. I used to think that meant I was failing… but now I see it meant I was showing up. And sometimes, showing up is more than enough.

I wish I would have known how fast it all goes.

When you’re in the thick of it—diapers, tantrums, sleepless nights—it feels like it will last forever. You’re counting down to the next nap, the next stage, the next moment of quiet.

But now? I look at my kids, older and growing into their own people, and I realize those “long days” were actually the shortest moments of my life.

I wish I would have held on a little tighter.
Stayed a little longer.
Worried a little less about the small things.

I wish I would have known that every phase—no matter how hard—passes.

The crying stops.
The messes get smaller.
The chaos quiets down.

And one day, you’ll miss the very things that once overwhelmed you.

I wish I would have known that being a mom isn’t about being perfect.

It’s about being present.

It’s about loving through the hard days, the loud days, the messy, imperfect, beautiful days.

If I could go back, I wouldn’t change the struggles—because they shaped me. But I would remind myself to breathe more, soak it in, and trust that I was doing better than I thought.

Because that’s the thing about motherhood…

You don’t have to be perfect to be exactly what your kids need.

🧡⎯thee unfiltered mama

💛Day 3 of 14